So I walked out of my room and there was my brother....standing naked
today is my dealer's birthday. i dont know whether to give him the day off or call him saying happy birthday ill take a quarter please
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
If I were there, I'd be putting a martini in you, via funnel if need be, and you would be doing this thing.
Its not that I'm getting free haircuts... Its just that she is paying for sex with haircuts...
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
Dude. I am seriously trying SO hard not to be amused by Honey Boo Boo. But the fact is, she just got a mani pedi with her gay uncle Poodle, and he got a discount because he only has nine toes, and I am ALL IN.
the fact that i already established a hook up buddy for thanksgiving break is genius
Children cease to be precious when they crap their shorts in the pool I exercise at.
You better fucking tell me or I'm turning blow job week into go fuck yourself week.
hell or highwater he WILL get a blowjob in the hammock before the end of summer.
We probably are going to die. So. Thanks for agreeing to be my Maid of Honor even though I torture you.
I've seen you go skiing on a Tuesday, but you think you're too good for TGI Friday's?
Hiding in a kitchen with no pants orange juice abs a pillow...please joun
I haye tequella
There is way too much butt cleavage here for a formal event.
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