I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
the cure to his relationship is in or around my vagina.
yeah that facebook group of people who have had sex with me probably isn't to discreet...
The story about him having a girlfriend changed real fast when he found out that I was a gymnast
We did lines off of a Whitney Houston CD case. That makes everything okay.
My pussy is making all kinds of justifications that my mind would have no patience for if it was still in charge
I gave up trying to understand them years ago. Now I'm just trying to fuck them.
So ive narrowed my options down to getting food or masturbating. Don't judge me
This election needs to be over, im tired of girls asking who im going to vote for mid hookup
my math prof is telling us what to do in a gun fight. i dont want to live in oakland anymore.
Sex and sushi don't even sound good right now... I might be on my death bed. To my Liz, I leave my extensive movie collection and my drinking supplies. To Olive I leave my car. Cause every Scottish terrier needs a 2010 Camaro.
Flacco has been sacked like 7 times. His name also auto corrects to Flaccid. That's so sad
Stop talking and go back to bed. You're in the kitchen in your underwear and slept in your car.
Do not buy a prego test at the Walgreens you frequent. It's awkward. Just trust me.
I was peer pressured into smoking weed by a bunch of LGBTQ teenagers
Randomize
