Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
remember that time i ran away from the bar and passed out in a street cot?
neither do i
I wanna eat
then frost
then eat your cupcake
yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
He suggested abortion before I finished the sentence. That was my plan too, but now I feel like should keep it just to prove how big of a dick he is.
She slapped his drink out of his hand to get him to leave the bar while he and I were having an intense debate about the lyrics to mmmbop
I just remember being in the bathroom alone cussing out the bunny
my favorite homeless guy just told me I drive like Batman, achievement unlocked
googling pictures of Lindsey Lohan so that I know what to wear to court is definitely a low point in my life
Most senic walk of shame ever. This is why you go to school in Hawaii.
Let's not fuck on an air mattress tonight...I'd rather get rug burn.
Those were some damn good pancakes you made last night.
Dude I've been in FL since Monday.
It's 4:30 AM and I just walked through a line of 10 deer without them freaking out. I am the campus deer king.
I feel like I spent all day wearing underpants made entirely of poison ivy and sandpaper
admittedly, geting that drunk in front of my last two exes wasnt a good idea
probably didn't help that you cheated on them with each other either
Randomize
