My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
Apparently I farted on her in my sleep. Then, just to be sure she was cool, I did it again on purpose and she didnt say anything. So, WIN?
can't decide if i want to get drunk or coked for this harry potter thing.. it is kind of long
aren't you going with children?
You only like me because I'm a challenge
You already blew me
Hey got that picture this morning. 1. clean your room 2.what happened to your nail? and 3. your penis is amazing,.
Some guy just bought a handle of cuervo, a curling iron, and a power drill. Paid with a jar of change. I'm torn between avoiding him and befriending him..
They have chocolate covered tequila candy at work. This is not a drill. May be drunk by noon.
Cute underage boy is in my house.
OH MY GOD. DON'T DO ANYTHING. WHY IS HE IN YOUR HOUSE.
I just encountered the same creepy guy I showed you, he jumped inside the dumpster screaming.
Seriously. Texted me 4 times and that didn't wake me up so he nicely called and left a voicemail saying he WOULD call me 8 times. So when he called back I answered.
Ps we ordered a pizza at the pool today and I dropped the entire thing in the pool. We still ate it. #canthang
This guy is trying to get me to do some acrobatic gymnast shit just so he can see "my tight hole." I'm too big to be sweating in my own damn bed. Shittttt.
A penis isn't a time share. I want to own not rent.
I just masterbated to the home shopping channel...what have I become...
Can I come over?
Sorry I gave up dick for lent. Hit me up on Good Friday tho
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