So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
A 21st bday and NYE should be illegal to have in the same week...
You're going to have to tell him your name isn't Ivor McTruckson eventually.
for breakfast I had vodka and flavor blasted goldfish. and I'm topless.
The TA leading my study session just said "now get outta here. I need to get drunk before class"
Throwing up in his bed is not a step up in your relationship
I just want to have normal problems like what kind of puppy to get, or should I pay a hooker to fuck Scott, or even a dilemma about fucking Twizzlers. I don't know.
Your text makes more sense read in reverse.
So good!! I became real good friends with an adorable black lesbian couple from Baltimore and a man in a diaper.
He's not letting me leave till I cum. I am a hostage to my own vagina
I praised you last night for winning a chug off...you thanked me with a ridiculously hard headbutt. Thanks dick.
Also day 6: dick is healed and ready to go back to work.
But how MUCH of an emergency? Like, should I go to the ER now, or can it wait until after the bar crawl?
OMG LOOK AT THAT PIECE OF MAN
I haven’t trained for this.
He’s disease free and drives a Porsche. What else does a girl need?
Randomize
