i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
It had been so long since my last time that it was easily a double helping of stomach pancakes. I think she was mildly impressed.
dude. she was texting with her nipple. I love touch screen phones!
How could you not be happy? Its like "and then I found 5 dollars" but "and then I found a handle of vodka"
Toga everclear = hospital visit... Im sure the paramedics hate me right now
Still borderline I believe. As bad as this sounds, I feel God owes me one here and should not let his grandmother die till after my birthday
my professor saw me buying beer for the super bowl and said go patriots. thats how i know im getting an A in his class.
And your cousins porn shouldn't have been the first straight porn you watched. And for that I am sorry
I love you. We're gonna celebrate your 21st by putting people in duct tape bikinis and pushing them down tequila slip and slides
be warned: you might find a baby hampster in my bra
ever since I turned 21 the mother-daughter bonding sessions always end with whiskey and my little pony. I don't know why, it's just a thing that happens
Also my face is like def lowkey made of silly putty
No I kepy moaning and just called out a name to make them believe I was actually having sex instead of masturbating.
I have rug burns on my nipples. Thanks for being an awesome wing girl.
She made me baby bird juul smoke to her while we were fucking
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