So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
Don't put random dicks in your mouth or any other crevice for that matter... and i'm home in 30 seconds
Wish I got that text last night instead of this morning.
I feel like i got beat with a pillowcase full of tequila shots.
Yea it's a sex scar. But if anyone asks I tripped up carpeted stairs
Yeah we can't find him. He left a note saying he left and isn't that drunk with what appears to be an attempt at the quadratic formula for proof. He also wrote down his number and left his phone by the note
Oh you don't have to buy a shower curtain, I stole the one from her bathroom. It has dolphins on it.
she did 8 shots of vodka. THROUGH A SIPPY STRAW
I have got to meet this girl.
Please do us both a favor and come rip my clothes off.
Remember that time I got suspended in eighth grade, well it was like that but I was on acid and wearing goggles
They've taken all the lighthearted fun out of S&M.
he threw an umbrella that he ripped out of the table at the fence like he was harpooning a whale while the owner of the bar was outside then tried to blame it on an old man...
And I am bleeding like slutty girl #1 In a horror movie
Coming straight to your house after the flight. If not in Federal Prison for disobeying peanut laws.
Ive decided to see your threat against my life as you flirting
His sister hates me so I took his virginity on her bed
Randomize
