This kristen chick is fuckin nuts. She's pyscho. She's a trainwreck. She carries baggage. She's... Perfect.
If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
i think i have herpe
just one?
Ketchup is God's man juice
you were on all fours yelling at the earth to stop spinning.
I honestly get shocked all over again every time I pull his pants down. It's one of those feelings you never get tired of.
I've carried my liver for over 24 years. If it can't carry me for the next 24 hours than it deserves to be damaged.
I just got woken up by some Christians who wanted to talk about the bible. ways to make a hangover even worse for a thousand trebek
I'm in that weird half-dead, half fucked-simultaneously-in-every-orifice-by-a-bus-and-it-wasn't-a-good-time state.
It's supposed to be a shit show, it's an end of the world party.
He went down on me for an hour and a half. He needs to get promoted more often.
Sorry i ignored you for so long. I think my vibrator is broken.
I can appreciate that you picked up the hot drummer, but don’t have sex in front of my house lmao
There are only a few things more freaky than wandering around a zoo drunk.
he just kept biting everyone and singing hilary duff songs. i can't even bring him to a gas station.
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