White wifebeaters are like orgies with fat people. Enjoyable in private, i'm sure, but in public: no thanksss.
By the grace of god and the ingenuity of Alexander Graham Bell, this text message is made possibe: YOU ARE A WHORE
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
after last night i think it would be a good idea if i wrote a will... you know, just in case.
a cemetary is a place for people to rest in peace and you just spermed all over their land
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
There's a bed on the roof. The window behind it is too small for it to go through. I'm impressed.
Watching the tv in the reflection of my phone cause I'm too hungover to roll over.... Yes it is 4 PM...
I have no idea where I am, where my pants are, there is cheese stuck to my ass.. Why do I have your phone?
shot for shot with some guy twice your age to prove Detroit hustles harder then you left with him. We're tracking you
Dude, jerking off when you're all hopped up on pre workout energy supplements has got to be the greatest thing I've ever done.
I asked if he wanted to sext and he just started sending me pictures of his beard.
I'm going to miss hockey season. It was the best excuse to get drunk on a Tuesday night.
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
I just smoked weed with my physics professor. Tell me how my life is this.
I was at a hookups house and peed in his sink so I wouldn't wake up his mom... drunk me is on a different level
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