No one appreciates an amoeba in a balloon hat.
Why did u sent me a picture of a dead horse?
i could hear you having sex and was jealous, wanted to kill the mood
You were so hammed, you asked your buddy in Economics to plot a demand curve for Parmesan Cheese.
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
I swear she hasnt shaved since the last time we hooked up 5 months ago
Obviously you've never slept with someone who was deliverance level inbred.
He's probably the biggest I've seen outside of the porn I vehemently deny watching and he asks if I think he's too small
5% want to drink juice and feel better, 95% just want to touch your butt
this new dose of ADD meds is totally being waisted with the unemployed new graduate thing if only I could add my hyper focused side effects to a coverletter
I wish I could accurately explain the embarrassment of standing in your bathroom with women's nair on your ass waiting to get in the shower.
should i be that dick who brings a carpet in an uberpool
Why are you moving a carpet?
it's unimportant
Whatever, ill dance on the bar at applebees, don't try and act like you're above it.
Woke up with a lip tattoo that says "fake news" in case you're wondering about my wellbeing
Nah leave him alone, he is at the strip club with his mom.
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
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