Going to bed naked. Too bad I am all alone. Need to make some changes. Either sleep with clothes or with you
If you were a Panda and I were a Koala and we had a baby, it'd be a falafel. Just think about that.
um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
I'm not saying he's gay. Just that he prob knows what a dick tastes like
:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
You proceeded to call me a hoe and then informed me that Bear Grylls is and always will be more important than I am to you.
I woke up with my keys safelty pinned to my thong. It's gonna be a great day.
do you actually have a paper bowl full of broken glass and ecstasy or was that just a dream?
I mean, we do coke and have sex occasionally...I wouldn't call that a relationship.
I slept with an Israeli and a Palestinian in the same day. It feels wrong.
I just woke up under my desk. Not to worry though, no one is in the office yet
Funny how I'm trusting a magic 8 ball I found in the kids toy section to tell me about my sex life
You yelled This cop is arresting me for possession! Possession of MARIJUANA!!", everyone cheered, and you let him handcuff you and take you away.
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
Looks like I'm not in the Ashly Madison files. But my wife is.
Randomize
