BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
who am I kidding I don't have any dignity. Plus we're not doing a porno, we're just doing random things naked
Well the walls are thin and I can hear the couple next door having sex. I think their dog is somehow involved.
I can't talk to her. I know entirely too much about her genitals to hold a conversation without mentioning them.
Ugh I hate you, and the responsible adult life I pretend to have during daylight hours
shes on the ground doing bicycle kicks screaming "is my ass good enough for you now satan" send help
I don't think I'm allowed to have Burger King. What if i just chew for taste and not actually consume. Like a wine connoisseur for fast food
Girls at BYU need to learn how to handle a penis. I swear my date last night was trying to pull it off my body to use later.
You kept trying to make cocktails with my protein powder last night...
I just changed all my morning alarms to wake me up with different Jesse McCartney songs telling me I'm beautiful. Would you believe I'll be 25 this year?
Omg she's a human wrecking ball. I love it.
I am to reach this level of casual destruction.
I don't think I'm ever gonna need a boyfriend again. I have a body pillow, a vibrator, and I'm strong enough to open my own jars.
BITCH I AM EXPERIENCING THE FEMININE MYSTERY SHUT UP AND GIVE ME DRUGS
The fact he has had a girlfriend for 5 years and they are trying to work it out isn’t going to stop me from sleeping with him. He said it himself you can’t cheat on someone you love...
Sorry I drunk. I wouldn’t eat those pancakes. I think I put glitter in them.
Randomize
