i just woke up and its 10 o'clock and the words "Robbies Fave Restraunt" and written in sharpie above my vage. Help me.
drinking warm bud heavies i found in the garage and googling how to tell the gosselin kids apart.
I'm 99% sure that for 3 hours I thought you were British. We must smoke that again.
Either I get my picture taken sitting on a fuckin pony, or I'm not coming.
this is the second time in my life i thought i might need to go to rehab. im including all the mornings that i wake up in dewey beach as "the first time"
come on down! you are the next contestant on the night is drunk!
my hip hurts so fuckin bad. and I just found a half eaten burrito in my nightstand drawer.
Currently in the bathroom stall of a gay bar in new haven giving myself an anti throw up pep talk
Shots. Renamed a guy (he looked like a Scott to me), running, bloody Marys, walk to Safeway, donuts, ride home from someones husband, Nurse Jackie. FIN.
I may have farted on a group of children. It may not have been an accident.
Was considering going to moonshine but I think I'm just gonna stay home and drink beer because there is no law against partial nudity here.
I mean, except for the part where I was vomiting up pineapple and hot sauce, it was a really fun time.
Btw, remind me to tell you about how I had to cancel my crazy wild sex plans with Will b/c my roommate came back from his trip after a day b/c Canada wouldn't let him in. Fucking cockblock.
Actually that's the whole story. You don't have to remind me.
I need to stop acting like a porn star that isn't getting paid
I woke up next to a box of cheese bread it was super romantic
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