awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
She was so happy she found her sunglasses, that she blew me. Im now randomly hiding things of hers in hopes she'll find them and I'll get a repeat performance.
Just saw a baby with a T-shirt that read "I am the result of my mother forgetting to take her magic pills". I can't believe they make shit like that.
Almost told my boss I was an expert aat swallowing when he questioned my ability to take excedrin,xanax, and a vitamin all at once. It was a medicinal gang bang lubricated by arizona tea.
Gotta admit I did think about bartering you out to the gay guys for $20 and the dudes flashy neck scarf
there is a hole burned clean through my text book on forestry law and I saw you walking around with a blowtorch last night. Hope you have $160 on ya...
I'm cutting her off I can't have my good name soiled with these kinds of shenanigans
Shit is preposterous
i knew it was love when she pulled a beer out from between her boobs and offered it to me
after attempting to eat a candy cane bigger than my hand i have determined there's no way to eat this that doesn't seem erotic
First things first, I always get more drunk than the birthday girl. Like, who's idea was it to sing karaoke? I killed it.
"Accidentally" bump into him after class.
I'm gonna "accidentally" put his dick in my mouth.
He is a sex God. It lasted more than an hour, and I don't remember how many times I came. I lost count at 57.
I thought my holiday spirit was gone this year until I got banged to Christmas music. It's back.
Is texting an old booty call with "can you still get your ankles behind your ears?" an appropriate way to reemerge into the singles scene???
There is sex in the air. Be careful where you walk.
Randomize
