You and i never got to the, we dont care what we look like friend-stage. you know? like not brushing your teeth stage.
sorry im really high
i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
You were waisted for 48 hours and the only 3 words you said were yup, sure, and michigan
Fire inspection over. Blunts are OK
this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
She definitely looked like a troll, but I had take one for the team. Or at least thats what I keep telling myself
No, that was the night I was sneezing out barf
Have the decency to NOT HANG YOU'RE USED CONDOM ON THE FOOSEBALL HANDLES! Dickhead.
How do I enter a double puke and rally into my calorie counter?
I think the solution to your phobia is an open relationship with your dildo. about the same responsibility as a pet rock
And is it bad that I haven't talked to guys who I haven't already dated? I feel like a recycle bin.
There they were doing the deed on the beach, looked like two seagulls fighting over a chicken bone.
I just formed the "shit on a tree in Chicago club." And I feel awful about it.
I love standing in line at rite aid for 10 minutes being forced to talk to my ex's mom about life while I'm holding nothing but yeast infection cream
I just upped my southern womanhood. Taking whiskey and Kleenex pocket packs to the funeral.
Randomize
