he texted me telling him i gave him the clap. but i think he gave it to me and i gave it back to him
Oh right she's pregnant - that's why all of her statuses have been uber depressing
well seeing as i got a call at 5 am from the hotel manager telling me my cousin was passed out on the lobby floor...not good
It's been over a year since we've been get-so-drunk-you-throw-beer-cans-at-fat-girls-drunk together. That needs to change.
I also point out to everyone that she looks like DJ's gf on Roseanne.
you got coffee,laid,and a sandwich. that never happens when I work
No one understands the complete and utter debilitating 3 day bday bender.
On the flip side Weston asked if he could move me to Wisconsin to be his "moto hoe" which is actually a thing apparently
I felt like I was having sex with Joffrey from Game of Thrones. Needless to say how bad it was
I'm watching Part of Your World now and I'm crying and I feel like I'm floating right along with her. This. This right here is some drunken Disney Magic
For not being a nurse or a sex worker I have seen an alarming amount of penises.
So I'm at early voting and the group of ladies behind me is talking about voting no on 2 and my gummy is kicking in, thank lawd
I made soup. Now I'm having post soup making wine. I had pre soup making wine also.
I’ve lost count of how many disciplines of science this conversation about Harry Potter has gone through.
Is that strawberry winking at me??
Randomize
