I fink we're distracting them from bumping the proverbial uglies
K, im just throwing this out there, i am not making out with any of his friends... Especially the cross eyed one.
apparently i walked up to the counter, put $30 worth of snacks next to this girl, and went 'uhh i have no money'
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
I'm pregaming before our pregaming dinner...with peanut butter and beer. I think I need to re-evaluate my budget...
Just the budget?
I'm practically paying him in tacos to have sex with me.
Getting sick, pulled the filter off a camel crush and rolled it into my joint to clear my sinuses. If there were stoner awards, I'd receive one.
It's the building I live in, they were lucky I was wearing clothes at all
My body is like , remember when you wouldn't let me puke last night? Good luck at work fucker.
WHY IS FOOD SO DELICIOUS
BECAUSE SCIENCE
I'm drinking your booze since you ate my pop-tarts. I'm telling you this because I still don't think it's a fair trade.
Hey... Tell me if you remember differently, but nobody truly saw me naked, right?
Just walked in on him banging another girl. He told me " sorry but I'm gonna finish now that I'm caught" ...... I think this is the reason god gave me four older brothers....
With great boredom comes great irresponsibility.
Please tell me you're not on their roof again..
I caught myself caressing my own hand while nurturing a glass of bourbon. I think it's time to get back out there.
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