i found her turbo button.....if you know what i mean.
She was Ugg boots AND a Bumpit. Of course I didn't sleep with her.
sorry about calling you the devil all night.
im sitting in my room wearing my power rangers shirt watching a movie about a magical dragon. Ive totally forgotten what having a sex life is like.
i knew it was time to break up with him once he pulled out the Halo foreplay costumes
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
i dont care if i had to wear a dress to fuck her, she was super hot and i stand by my decision
I had a dream that we erected a stage in our living room for "impromptu performances" how can we make this a reality?
I cannot even. Taco bell reception. Beers. New friends from Georgia.
Do something fun then. Blow up the house or whatever.
How have you survived this long?
Dumb luck and a deal with the devil.
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
Just once, I'd like to hook up with a girl that doesn't look like she's having a near-fatal seizure when I give her an orgasm.
Let's just say his oral game was lacking. Hell, lacking is too nice of a word to describe it.
HOW THE FUCK IS IT POSSIBLE THAT THE JUNIOR HIGH STUDENT IS BETTER AT BEING AN ADULT THAN I AM!?!?
I got my gum stuck on his balls.
Randomize
