You know how I told you I don't have many naked pics? Apparently that changed last night.
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
The plants looked thirsty. Growing plants need mimosas too.
I wouldn't accept the money so he folded the $20 bill into an origami puppy and left a note saying "Not blowjob money"
The plan is to make enough mistakes this weekend to hold me over until spring break
If someone would have told me in preschool that I was going to do him I would have said no
Can we dedicate this weekends marathon sexcapades to all the haters?
I'm gonna give him birthday punches. On the dick. With my mouth.
Things I want for my birthday 1. a Chipotle grade tortilla steamer 2. a new liver
correction: my vagina hates that I'm smart.
OHMYGOD I LITERALLY JUST FINISHED JERKING OFF AND MY MOM BUSTS IN AND HANDS ME A BABY WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON IN MY HOUSE JESUS H CHRIST!
She showed me her tits outside Taco Bell....After she flashed the dude working there in an effort to get in.
I know it's going to be a good day because he didn't notice the bite mark on my butt.
I just unmatched him. If your Thirsty Thursday only consists on the gym then I am not the woman for you ✌🏻️
You know what...ii have the turtles...were together....i love these god damn turtles...
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