fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
He just spent five minutes trying to sling shot a cheese-it off his dick and into my mouth.
I'm so cold I just used my boobs to keep my face warm
I just made a friends list on fb of all the guys ive hooked up with. genius.
I cant believe Lindsay Lohan feels like this every day
at the time it didn't seem likely that you would ever find the cake in your underwear
Ye. Looking like it's about to be one of those mythical responsible weekends
only thing in my fruit bowl is 4 champagne corks and a jenga piece . Tuesday.
As a gentleman, I asked her if she was sure and she just whispered "wreck me" in my ear. I took that as a green light.
I'm finally in my bed, my pants are off, and there's no pee on my carpet this is the best life has been all day
I vaguely remember losing my underwear to 2 chicks in a bathroom. That drunk.
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
I worry about your feelings an awful lot for somebody who gets off on making you cry
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like picking cocaine boogers out of your nose at your parents house.
But the problem is you celebrate with your heart but I celebrate with my liver
Randomize
