I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
tequila makes my crab dance SOOOO much better
He went so fast i didnt even have time to pretend like i was about to have a fake orgasim
Do you think if Santa was real that he's have a big penis?
just because you are in college doesnt mean its okay to pregame easter mass.
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
there are two kinds of girls in this world: my mom, and sluts.
they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
I don't know if I have the sustained energy level for partying hard
Not a choice. You are mistaking my comments as options. My statements are facts. This is what is happening.
Ok- my dad's ex-wife's Irish nephew. Weird if we fuck or not?
omg he is no good in bed, bless his little heart and his big dick
Also, my phone suggested the phrase “puke in the mailbox" how many times have I had the need to text that to people?
I've finally done it, I've downloaded some messenger lesbians like to use because some girl wanted to flirt.
Congrats, you're all grown up now.
I FEEL LIKE A GAY BUTTERFLY
Of course I fucked her, her man stole my bike when we were kids
So technically I made out with my second cousin this weekend... But it's by marriage and I'm adopted, so it's ok.
Randomize
