apparently he thought telling me 'the weasel wants to come out to play' would somehow convince me to go down on him
I'm pretty sure this is how polyamorous relationships begin.
Ate apple sauce off his penis. Nutritious and slutty.
There's a point around the one and a half minute mark where the keg stand goes from impressive to pathetic
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
You are softly singing to the wall while slow dancing with it. I feel as though you should discontinue this behavior.
remember when I told you about my grandma asking me about my sex scars? Less comfortable than that
also, add "teaching boys to sext" to my charity work
drunk caitlyn doesn't know how to work gmail. so know an email has been sent to the entire campus with a picture of me naked eating a bagel attached.
All I see when I think of you are dancing penis angels around your head.
She is so graceful and lady-like, like a swan... On meth
At tuba camp, the pickings are slim. It's like being the tallest midget.
Somehow I became in charge of getting my mother laid? This can't be my life? Lol
Look, he's a hot korean guy with a motorcycle and a great ass. I'm gonna do head-titingly kinky shit with him.
I'm actually really happy I can say that my first body shot was out of a gay strippers massively ripped chest
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