omg so im topless lying on my bed and i forgot my nail clippers are on my bed and i just leaned forward and the nail clipper closed. on my nipple. ouch
so we told my parents we were going trick or treating. got high as shit at some playground. and then bought our own candy so we looked legit when we got home.
I am currently eating pure cake frosting...I am not sure how I was ever referred to as a responsible adult.
I might not be able to enter cuba but that doesn't mean that a cuban can't enter me
you are not perverted enough for this relationship to work out.
you goin out tonight?
who is this.
your orgasm for tonight
Im otw to class. I was at the Library. Just past three girls with a bottle of tequila playing dizzy bat.
He drew a bath for me. It was only cute until he started throwing in celery and calling me soup.
I love her to death but its like you have to do 5 lines of coke to be on her level.
You were just so carefree! People were like, "there's broken glass everywhere" and you were just like, IDGAFFFFFFF
I need to stop acting like a drunk bitch. People are going to get the right idea about me...
You're such a good friend. You send me pictures of your boobs when I'm sad. I will always appreciate that.
I literally just told you I found out I masturbate in my sleep. I think we can be snapchat friends again
I've never had to say don't judge me for chip clips in the shower before
You should probably come home from vacation now. I make badddd decisions when you're gone.
Randomize
