She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
I just want to go some place where I can have a nice night. Grind on men who speak no English, make out with a girl, and not feel judged.
i felt obligated to tell him happy birthday since we trashed his house and i fucked his friend in his basement
I was in bed at 845. Affairs take a lot out of people
The fact that its 10am on a gameday and I have yet to shotgun is absurd
I've decided the third guy that I slept with is who I lost my virginity to...
Good lord, they've set up every firework to be ignited by a trail of gasoline at midnight. God save us all.
There is a visibable outline from you in the grass. its you in the fetal position...
Whenever there is a ShotSki involved, I have no excuse but to drink, right? It's like a rule.
Also I'm sitting home alone with a big ass bowl of marshmallows right now just eating. It's so sad.
I think after 8 tries we can say Stoli Thursdays cause too much damage.
They won't let me buy alcohol in the airport until 9am. Super judgemental
I told you I missed you and you said you missed me as much as you miss a urinary tract infection. I get it. You're still mad.
Who's the naked guy asleep in your car?
I had sex with a boy who lives in a closet, that's like having sex with Harry Potter, right?
Randomize
