go do what you do best...puke behind churches
everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
i'm trying to figure out what goes best with beef ramen. a 2007 merlot or a 2008 pinot noir? i'm leaning toward the pinot noir.
It was beyond pathetic. You yelled her name at every blonde chick we saw hoping it would be her. Then you puked your corn dog
I'm gonna be a few minutes late, some asshole just fell off the ferry so we had to stop.
he suggested we do it doggy style cuz it was his dead dogs birthday...i had to do it
I hope your sleeping good cuz when u wake up im punching you square in the face
So a sorority girl just introduced herself to me by saying "a guy I used to fuck just threw up on me" and then she grinded on me
I'll just tell your children you were the queen of drunk town and you had a giant purple monkey named bongo
Talking to her is like watching "Bad Life Choices: The Movie"
Also I've been at work for an hour and I've already been "honey"d "babe"d and "beautiful"d by three separate men. Apparently hungover with yesterdays make up looks good on me.
My mom added me on Snapchat which means I am officially done with Snapchat.
I’ve developed a strange interest in ear wax removal vids on YouTube. Dear god, I need to get a job
You took your pants and underwear off as soon as we got to Melissa's and just walked around the entire time like it was completely normal. We even ate pizza together with your vagina exposed. You're my hero.
Did April legit get married in a parking lot?
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