I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
just once id like to meet someone on craigslist who isnt fat
...I woke up with a yo yo in my underwear...
Ah that type of Dick. I think my phones trying to make me less of a whore by capitalizing Dick. That way it looks like I'm talking about a dude not penis
Can you come over to my place and make up for the crap you called sex yesterday?
Good morning to you
if we break up, blackout me is coming back, making out with everything in sight
I have the Everlasting Gobstopper of boners right now. It's kinda like a gift from god, but I don't want to spend anymore time with this girl than I have to.
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
Congratulations, your dick has been selected to participate in my birthday sex. Please reply with a response.
Do I have a choice?
I am sorry, you're response was not recognized. Please try again.
Twas the night before the bachelor party, and all thru the house...not a creature was stirring, not even a stripper?...
Worst part of blacking out... Waking up and having to do the teeth check
Nurse helped me count all my sexual partners and still gave me her phone number. She shall be #73.
Some random at the bar just whispered in my ear that he wants to eat me out while on bath salts....
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
Rage-masturbating and then crying myself to sleep. Welcome to Wednesday.
Randomize
