Mom and Dad are dead. Trust fund
Im not sure if he just tripped or was star gazing, but i gave him head anyway.
is it bad that listening to the rabbi's wife talk about how we should only be with one person is making me really, really horny for no string attached sex
A guy in a sombrero stopped to take a picture with me sitting on the curb.
Dont worry about the blood on the pillow. its from my face.
I pretty much envision me eating a turkey leg whilst fucking you. I have priorities.
It was like the titanic mixed with those sad puppy commercials mixed with jello shots
Its okay, i dont mind you drinking, im just surrounded by it, there is some random dude laying on your couch with a bucket that ive never seen before
I can't even express how horny I am. The English language isn't equipped for what I'm plotting.
I’d feel the same about religion. We can talk about it, but I want you to go down on me first
You date? I thought you just hooked up with your TAs
I don’t know what he is but he sure can suck a lollipop.
so i was about to call you for your birthday but then i started making out with this guy... and i feel bad but i felt like you'd understand
He howled at the moon then told me that if i were a dog he'd have sex with me...either i look like that girl or i need to stop going on blind dates. Period.
HANDS OFF UNTIL AFTER I DO BUTT STUFF WITH HIM.
Randomize
