so I was thinking like, Rob Pattinson could make so much money whoring himself out dressed as Edward Cullen.
yeah, I mean if he's down to fuck a lot of fat chicks and stare at Tiger Beat posters of himself above the bed...
in the middle of sex he stopped to tell me that he loved me... then slapped my ass and told me "back to business"... im gonna marry him
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
For the love of God you used a 40 foot extension cord to bungee jump out the off the 2 nd floor
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
Why are you always at the walk in clinic, Lady Chlamydia?
You're not allowed to make that my permanent nickname.
In the middle of the State of the Union, she unzipped my pants and started giving me head. I've never been so proud to be an American.
We built a fire and had sex in the kiddie pool. Then he washed my hair
Strong work
His brother just asked him in all seriousness if it would be cool if they became eskimo brother brothers.
His new girl is probably classy and boring. I bet she doesn't feed him sour patch kids while she wiggles his weiner.
Got kicked out of the club and woke up at a frat house. Good night? Couldn't tell you. I got a date out of it I'm glad someone thinks my drinking problem is cute.
I have more important things to worry about than you drowning your cheerios in tequila.
You like that 95% of the time I masterbate I think bout you?
Just wanna know what I can I do to earn the other 5%
the yoga instructor with the "dirt" and "roots" tattoos is seriously mother nature. i get my period after ever session i have with her. i'm trippin' balls over it.
Randomize