We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
You just left with that feminine looking guy you kept calling "Jessica." Just giving the heads up.
If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
I think I left a blow job at your house. Can I come down and get it?
I gave it to your brother to give to you.
a price tag just fell out of my vag. i guess its worth $13.99...
We're drinking vodka. Wine is for people who have to wake up in the morning.
So if I tell her fire is hot and it will burn her... she's probably just going to keep throwing her vagina at it huh?
Eating pizza and drinking wine while I watch the Victoria's Secret Fashion Show. The wine is for reducing the pain of falling asleep with more insecurities than what I woke up with.
I'm making a quesadilla and including it in the picture because that's the only way I think I can send her dick pics.
I think I fell in love with her when I saw her kick a freshman in the chest
omg how embarrassing to not hear the delivery person knocking because you're singing "where are you Pizza" to the tune of "where are you christmas" too loudly
I bought more beer than I could carry and managed to fit it all in the fridge. It's an alcoholicmas miracle.
I woke up at 3am, top off, with campus security telling me to get dressed. Tonight was a GOOD NIGHT
I finally got my restraining order in the mail. Was that supposed to upset me? I'm just over here like "TELLEM BOY BYE!-\nlegally..."
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
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