I just learned that your liver regrows itself every 2 months. Best news I've heard all week.
doing shots has become such a natural thing to me that i just instinctively swallowed listerine
There is so much to learn about oneself from autofill.
I can't tell if I miss summer or 5 times a day sex more.
sorry can't. you know Saturday is the masturbating day for single sorority girls here.
I should probably go to bed before I start to care about why I started drinking in the first place.
Today is definitely a "stand over the toilet and pee through the opening at the bottom of my boxers" kind of day.
I guess the silver lining is that having a big dick really comes in handy when you're hungover.
It's a mixed blessing.
Solid. Can't put a price on good times
You can and it's called a liver.
It's my vagina- remember its magical and yes I just did mini spirit fingers
What not to say at an interview: i can wrap the shit out of some food.
You poured your drink on him and called him a "useless cocksucker" because he wouldn't give you a ride home... on his skateboard
Sorry, I know you're at the airport but a gram of coke is missing so good luck with security!
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
Just packed vodka and spare underwear into my purse- totally set for watching the hockey with him tonight
I just googled "how to blow an uncircumcised guy" and did serious research. That's how badly I want to fuck him.
You misuse your internet privileges.
Randomize
