Oh I forgot to tell you one of the little boys in my preschool class was wearing a Hooters tank top today.
Well, that's a 3 inch weight lifted off of my vagina
So I totally just remembered that you tried to smoke a hornet out of it's nest.
You obviously dont comprehend the level of insane i operate at
nothing says roomie bonding better than a sunday shroom trip.
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
I'm doing somethin that's never been done before...the 10 am booty call come over
I find it very uncomfortable that I need to ask you to stop sending me pictures of your stomach
We should hook up after this. Laugh or look horrified to say yes.
Oh god. Just tried to hail a pizza delivery car. Awkward.
International sake day = success
He said he wanted to "superfuck" me
Does he wear a cape??
I'm drunk enough to know I'm texting you and sober enough to know what I'm saying to you
I guess I'm an especially affectionate person under the influence of tequila.
It's an interesting experience to pee while a bird meows at you.
You need to get out of the house more
The weirdest part of it all was wondering if I was going to take off his fanny pack or he was before we fucked
Randomize
