CNN just did a special on how to do heroin safely.. I recorded it for us
no guy is ever going to take you seriously as a potential marriage prospect unless you learn to swallow
They made the rule if I caught the ball with my cleavage they would drink the entire beer pong table. I don't think they expected me to actually do it.
he fed me chocolate as I gave him a handjob. I felt like a princess.
I just made a drug deal 100% through snap chat
THIS IS WHY I WENT TO SCHOOL FOR TO BE A COSMETOLOGIST TO HELP MY EX BOYFRIENDS CURRENT GIRLFRIEND BE MILDLY ATTRACTIVE... Everything DOES happen for a reason
I rubbed his back while he puked for an hour and then ended up getting laid when I tried to put him to bed, best puke and rally I've ever seen.
We turned a wake into a bar crawl.
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now
Goodbee
I just got CPR certified, don't make me need these skills so soon
Girl just left one of the apts upstairs carrying a giant bottle of kahlula and a lunchable.... I feel like we could be friends
You walked in with a bag of weed and asked for a watermelon. For some reason they actually gave you one, and you made it into a perfectly working bong. Two of them offered their girlfriends to you for the night.
I don't think there's a ladylike way to tell this guy I want to sit on his face
You've been inside me, dude. There's no such thing as TMI.
Let the healthy eats/juice cleanse begin. Today is day 1
Have you cleansed yourself of the boy yet?
Randomize
