I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
Balls are like the throw pillows of the penis
I'm so high, I forgot to harvest my farmville crops....noooooooo.
Worst stoner tragedy.
Dude feel your hair right now it feels so weird like pasta
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
if the best thing you can say about him is "he probably wont kill me" you may want to rethink hanging out with him
I can hear her moaning. I'm on some random guy's counter. He wanted me to cuddle but I said I didn't know how.
We were debating whether rain water is clean enough to drink. I won when he started throwing up.
my longitudinal study of the long term effects of sloth and alchol-intake is nearly complete.
so you are graduating this semester.
We are 100% horrible people, and im extremely happy we are friends
He started yelling "you tha man!" while I was reverse cowgirl
I'm sorry I tried to spit drugs down your throat like a baby bird last night.
he's been dating her for 18 months and cheating on her with me for 16. if that's not commitment, i don't know what is.
If I had your ass I would rule the world
Randomize
