I took off my bra and money fell out...how crazy was I tonight?
I like to think it a success when the cops are called
M and I are hungry and we are making your pizza in the fridge. But you're having sex and we're not so we dont feel bad.
So on how many levels of wrong is it that I'm reconsidering my divorce simply because I don't want to go through getting used to shitting around someone again.
I might not remember all of last night but I clearly remember the part where I humped the mailbox.
im that hungover where parking at red lights has to be done
i sucked his cock and got snuggles in return. I'm the mother Theresa of giving in a relationship.
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
Well his ex just grabbed his dick and told him yep Ill call u later
I wouldn't be too worried. He's been known to chase a chubby before.
THAT IS NOT HOW YOU TALK TO YOUR SISTER
Also CANADIAN LIPS TASTE OF MAPLE SYRUP AND APOLOGIES. SORRY.
I tried smoking while wearing a horse mask, it was the worst thing I've ever smelled
Don't tell me you're on acid again
Did you pee in the oven last night??
I can't be held responsible for what I do for you after a blowjob like that.
Randomize
