if you like me you must not know who I am
I hope you're ready because I look like an elf on crack had a baby in the medieval era and that baby grew up to be a whore
Either seal the deal or get out of the room, I don't want to hide in this closet anymore
Sorry about last night..I didnt realize how drunk you were and when I closed the door it caused you to slam into the mirror...you'll probably piece together the puzzle when you read this and see your hand.
I just fell off my chair and knocked over the table. People are staring. That hungover.
It's called penis withdraw. Or alcoholism. I get them confused these days.
I'll throw in a blow job for your kind ways. Or another booty call. I'm poor and not very imaginative. This is all I have to offer- the unicorn like wonders of my vagina.
I projectile vomited in his sisters room where the toiled would have been if it were the bathroom.
WHO THE FUCK TAGS THEMSELVES AT COUNTY JAIL?!?!
So I saw her today...and it was weird...she is just like not pregnant anymore.
Dude...how high are you? of course she isnt pregnant anymore...thats what happens when you give birth
You shall now refer to my vagina as patty and patty only
Dude. I don't even want cuddles. I just want an acknowledgement that I just had balls in my mouth.
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
look, bitch. one day when everyone i care about deserts me for my severe moral depravity, you're going to be the only one i have.
i can't wait.
Give me the sexing that I truly desire and I will reveal to you the mysterious location of the PBR's
Randomize
