I found your undies. They were wrapped around my leg.
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
Just hit on a fat chick so shed buy me a drink. Then i walked away. Nice to see how the other half lives.
It was some time between the gurgles of her blowing me to us throwing up in the same bucket afterwards that I realized we would be doing this a lot.
Dude your not gonna get by security covered in blood wearing only a robe
Don't worry I'm drunk they won't say anything
I'll be there. With Doritos and whisky. Don't expect much more.
They need to leave so I can start drinking shamefully.
Just consider it? What else do you have going on today that could be as awesome as a day full of lord of the rings and sex?
She's going to be the first to die of too much illness. Not even super bad stuff like cancer but like for having a cold at the same time as a sore throat and chlamydia or something. Just too much diseases.
I got a 5 dollar bill, 1 condom, and no alcohol. I get payed on Thursday. Let's do this shit.
Sex in your truck helped me start regaining feeling in my jaw. Thanks!
currently working on a look that screams, "I'm dead inside, but still trying to enjoy the ride"
it was like reliving my childhood drunk at a bar.
If I could eat my chicken parm naked, it would be the closest I could ever be to God.
He eats ass but won’t hold open doors. My kinda guy.
Chivalry really is dead.
Randomize
