Apparently Chef Boyardee is the only guy I'm taking home tonight.
Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
dude i woke up to her making a statue of my morning wood for her sculpture class. HOW THE FUCK do you think i feel about her?
my little brother just told me that I should start chasing my vodka with slim fast. genious.
I saw the video from Saturday. So, how much did I drink for me to think I was a duck and strip my clothes?
I know it should be off bounds, but can this be the chick we all sleep with at some point? I can write it off as drunken mistake, you all just have to come up with equally good excuses
Definitely Got caught hugging a strangers tree last night with 5 others.
i ordered 6 shots "to go" what did you think was going to happen!
He recreated the night that started all my mothers days. We shared a joint, drank Boones Farm, and dry humped to the Beastie Boys. Then I cried over MCA's death. Best. Gift. Ever.
The quality of my porn watching experience has significantly declined. Thanks shattered iphone screen
And he's in a frat. Everyone in a frat is gay. It's science.
But I don't see you as the jesus riding a dinosaur with a machine gun type of guy
Wanna get business drunk and go play golf?
Look get the dick out ur mouth and answer the phone
I was watchin a porno and I sware I saw that dude at the bar at applebees the other night
Randomize
