no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
By the way, shout wipes are a gift from god for people that throw up on themselves.
Thanks for not cleaning the drain like you were supposed to. I just vomited in the shower and I had to stand in it until I was done conditioning.
Ya know, since we do have alot of sex with each other i figure i should wish you a happy valentines day
Just because im a good person doesn't mean that I don't reserve the right to be a complete dick about it.
...if you're living vicariously thought me, that was a great blow job you just gave in the B&N parking lot.
I don't listen when you talk. I just try to find new creative ways to get you to send me naked pictures.
Dude, for twins they have shockingly different blowjob styles.
STOP FUCKING MY SISTERS!!!!
A little, yeah. We were stealing firewood from the neighbors (drunk), and figured it would be 10 times harder to be angry with us if we got caught if we were naked, and 100% more hilarious.
I was passed out in a bathroom stall. Of course im going to look like shit
Only you can make me eat tacos in your car, while naked, on a dead end road in a ditch on a Thursday night.
I just wanted to tell you that the German word for "dickhead" can also be translated as "ass violin" and I think that's beautiful.
i need some fresh meat. meat that has a license and a job and isn’t a FULL-blown alcoholic. partial i could tolerate, bc, haha, let’s be honest, me likey my drinkies.
"fuck it, let's do moonshine" shouldn't be in ANYONE'S vocabulary.
The only good thing about 2020 is that the hot flight attendant neighbors are using my pool a lot. If i can keep them from wandering into my Zoom meeting with my boss I’m golden
Randomize