Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(678): View more from Georgia

he wanted me to dress up like someone from lord of the rings. I dumped him.

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(412): View more from Pennsylvania

you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..

(614): View more from Ohio

ya and it worked didnt it??

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(970): View more from Colorado

Nothing like a Mormon bachlorette party to make you feel slutty

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(616): View more from Michigan

No flamethrowers. That is a direct order.

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(480): View more from Arizona

You just threw your burrito at the passing teenage couple and yelled "It's never gonna last" of course your were a shit show

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(219): View more from Indiana

You know it's nice having a girlfriend who will lotion your balls for you

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(319): View more from Iowa

He asked me if I remembered touching his police badge. awk.

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(631): View more from New York

I'm thankful I didn't get drunk and shit my pants this year. 🦃

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(309): View more from Illinois

Well the cops were called after the kid fell, but we saw 4 cute guys from our window while it was going down, so it wasn't all that bad.

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