I'm sorry that you don't think that "Daddy Issues" are a real thing, but I can tell you that some assholes who never went to their daughter's dance recitals are responsible for getting me laid...continuously.
you kept slapshing your drinks on people saying the power of christ compels you.
Pre-order weed for 4/20 and i'll give you a discount.
I'm drinking vodka out of a coffee pot. and i'm not even mad about it
who said I'd never amount to anything...i just won 'most enthusiastic' at my poledancing class
We're making herpes jokes very loudly and hoping she notices.
We shaved off his eyebrows I'm pretty sure his fiance will be thrilled at the wedding
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
So many Oreos I'm regretting this decision already but I'm happy at the same time...The straddle is real
Struggle. Not straddle. I'm not straddling anyone.
He told me he loved me and then peed his own bed. So at least it was a memorable one night stand.
you know what? fuck you, fuck your nana, and ESPECIALLY FUCK THE BLACKHAWKS.
The fact that a spice girls song is stuck in my head is a great sign that my decisions aren't the right ones at the moment...
I'm sorry i showed you my boobs.. I probably shouldn't have done that.
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
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