Locked eyes w/ her at mainstreet, and said 'yeah yeah get it!' From there we started violently making out on the dancefloor (I had a FULL boner, ps) and then I got her number
Dude, I just rear-ended a cab
Are you drunk?
A little...yes
Run!
Terrible brother advice.
would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
in the middle of sex he stopped to tell me that he loved me... then slapped my ass and told me "back to business"... im gonna marry him
You left a skid on my bar stool!!!!
Oops! Sorry about getting stool on your stool!
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
The boat wouldn't start, so we brought it back to her house and we've been sitting in it in her driveway for the past 5 hours drinking beer and yelling at peoplee.
Also the fuck cup must be buried with me
Got to use the phrase "sweet pukas dude." My day is made.
So stoned that I pressed the unlock button on my car keys to walk into my bedroom...
So i know i said I'm turning over a new leaf, but i met a guy with a dick piercing. I have to sleep with him. For science.
He's going to wonder why I have burn marks on my asshole
I'm on the fast track to lesbian land
We fucked on the roof... like that has to mean something
if they didn't want us to do blow at uni, why would they make textbooks so smooth?
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