My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
Just saw a girl that looks like Michelle Obama and Im strangely aroused by her. Does that make me a democrat?
Bt dubs, I still have cuts on my arm from when you attacked me with a dildo on Saturday night.
Can we fast forward to the part where we get gyros
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
She's clinging to me like a horny koala.
he was wearing ninja turtle pajamas and he STILL got laid. who the fuck is this guy?!
Just lifeguarded a kid's party hungover so I could afford to go out drinking tonight. Circle of life shit goin on here.
Don't forget: you only show your tits for the good beads. Be judicious.
The effect you have on my penis from a different state is impressive
he had a Pillsbury dough boy tattoo to remind him of his drug dealing days
The Vicodin is in the strawberries.
I climbed up on the tank of the toilet so I could take a slo-mo vid of myself pissing into the garbage can, but the base of the toilet shattered and I had to bail.
ALL I WANT IS SEMEN IN/ON/AROUND MY BODY. WHY IS HE MAKING THIS SO HARD.
I might be getting fired on this week so the only option i see for tonight is to get smashed and have an orgy. actually this idea might explain why i'm not an ideal employee.
Randomize
