He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
I just smoked a bowl while riding a horse. This has been a productive vacation.
the girl next to me in class is drinking a margarita out of a slurpee cup. i know your going to ask how i know its a margarita and the answer is i can smell the tequila. i never want to leave this place
my mom found me this morning spread out like jesus sleeping on the living room floor. i had a piece of bread over my eyes to block the light out
She refered to her bed as the "cockpit"....I understand that this morning.
now you know why we've never bought a 12 pack of king cobras before.
Fuck. I just got my nipple tweaked by a plus size drag queen in a purple dress. I feel like I got molested by Grimace.
It was one of those "I have no idea if this will ever happen again so I can't say no" opprotunities. Part of me was like, "You slut" and the bigger part was screaming, "Hell yeah"
You told me you would ride a pig into the night sky screaming, "I wear my sunglasses at night"
Jacked up my neck and shoulder hanging on for dear life while I rode him like a boss. Plus my house smells like broccoli, bad! How's YOUR morning?
Shotgunning beers to finish a midterm project at 3am is a good idea right?
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
Can I borrow your google glasses to make a sex tape?
It's like sleep walking but with blowjobs
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