Ive never seen someone more dtf than a soaking wet drunk girl who stumbles into your backyard.
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
i have 90 minutes to kick this food poisoning or josh's first experience with buttsex will be his last
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
Bro that's the last time I try to stick my penis in a bowl of jello. I can't believe your sister ate that, did she not see my dick mold
I just want a whole pitcher of margarita and a headdress from party city and sit around and look like a fucking indian princess.
"I'm in the bathroom. Only place I can sit and relax without that girl trying to give me a lap dance."
This is possibly the most humiliating moment of my life. I have diarrhea, in a port-a-potty, at the Renaissance Festival.
My life has evolved from screwing randos, ok?
I don'y know if I should feel accomplished or disgusted. I just ate a dozen cookies all to myself. I'm leaning more towards accomplished.
Btw. I have a sinus infection from doing cocaine in a portapotty at a Duran Duran concert. So, gimme a couple of days before y'all start the party.
He said we were going to get fucked up in the woods so here we are
i like coming up with different names when i reference that night. 'the night i got kicked out of the bar', 'the night i escaped from the hospital', 'the night we had that threeway'...
so does the amount of bruises on my arms and legs mean we had fun last night?
I'm the only person I know that carries solo cups, shot glasses, ping pong balls, two decks of cards, and a lawn chair in his trunk. I'm ready to turn anything, anywhere into a party.
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