I wish i could tell a story about guys I know without the phrase "and then I blew him." coming up.
Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
No we didn't have sex. I got my period on his finger.
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
It's hard to be a gentleman when a girl pauses her karaoke version of "a whole new world," and proceeds to tell the entire bar that she wants your cock in her mouth.
my mom was by far the drunkest one there. best impromptu wednesday afternoon party ever
You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
You told me "I need to pound this drinks if I'm going to pretend his dick is big enough" then left. Dollar night quotes 2012
If I drank a glass of water for every drink I had I'd die of water intoxication like some tweaked out looser at a rave
I like literally had a visual image of his penis going into your soul
I made a half way decent playlist
Im gonna call it "hanging myself"
I HAD TO PAY A COVER FOR THE FIRST TIME LAST NIGHT. My tits didn't get me in and I was so pissed.
I may have taken the entire adderall. I FEEL LIKE THE FUCKIN HULK. I can't stop cleaning and organizing and doing the clean things
Grrr. Fine. You get oral for being unwrong.
All I wanted to do was come home from work and masturbate for national sex day... I sliced my the tip of finger giving myself a pedicure so I can’t even do that #singlelife
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