But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
During sex he wiggled his hips and said "I'm turning the ice cream" Deal breaker?
I don't know what you drank last night but you really enjoyed the 4 egg body shots.
I wouldnt consider it a good Wednesday if there wasn't any projectile vomit involved
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
You can't say "they have anal bleaching for that" and then just hang up
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
no drinking for a week
if by week you mean tonight and by no you means yes
She's like my safety school. At the end of the night, if I haven't found anyone better to hook up with, I can always call her if I need a place to drop a load and don't want to rub one out myself. Perfect next door neighbor.
My goal for the night is to see your housemate's one lonely teste.
Am I really in your phone as Asshole Jesus??
By far the fardest thing to do drunk is open a band aid
I've reached the last of the wine in my cup so now I have to sit up in my bed to get it through the crazy straw
Ya can’t just go throwing accusations around about someone pooping their pants without some hard evidence
Ahaah! I just stole batteries from work for my vibrator. I am that person.
Randomize
