Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
I just did the classiest thing ever.
last time you said that you got chlamydia.
No, i'm not gonna let you give me a footjob on the floor of the cheesecake factory. C'mon.
i tried to hook up with a mom and then her husband came with num chucks
The girl in the white might have stds. I'm strangely okay with this.
i just wanna lock my vagina in a safe filled with bandaids and healthy things
Chris threw beer can at guy. Guy ended up being a fighter. Chris got his eye socket broke. Fighter got hand re-broke. Chris is passed out. Fighter is in kellys bed. everybody won last night. I think.
When i left he was drinking an entire pot of coffee out of the pot with a straw. It's safe to say he's using a personal day
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
You went to the animal party as a hoodrat. You won the most creative costume contest.
I just found a To Do list on the table, written by me last night, that just says "1. Go downstairs. 2. Get Pickles. 3. Laptop"
My soul is telling me that I need to take this exam naked.
Wait... why were you finger painting at one in the morning?
The last time I saw you, you were giving the stripper a lap dance.
DO NOT FUCK YOUR ENGAGED GAY NEIGHBOR!
Randomize
