are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
who knew getting puke in ur hair could make it look so cute and curly. minus the crusty puke part
It was kinda bitchy last night when i brought up my pregnancy scare and you said "shotty playing with it"
It's called penis withdraw. Or alcoholism. I get them confused these days.
How does "I'm not drinking tonight" turn into body shots?
Help. Me. He just whispered 'prepare yourself', & sprayed hairspray everywheres to make sure the 'air was crisp'
The fact that I pulled something plastic out of my mouth after taking that shot is starting to concern me.
Where are you and who are these girls passed out on the floor?
and why are they spooning a flamingo?
they traded weed for a spot on our floor. be nice.
It got messy; I did a shot of seamonkeys.
SIMBAAAA REMEBER WHO YOU ARE
For future reference.... When you take a beer out of a 6pack... You don't insert your phone as a substitute.
The beer shits the day after completing the World Beer Tour at Epcot are just as epic as the tour itself.
Dude, I'm not going to use a butt plug.
sorry for pouring tequila vodka and whiskey down your throat and left you to sleep on a table
Just a typical Friday. Dinner, drinks, doing lines with a member of Congress
Randomize
