I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
OMFG I JUST SAW SOMEONE GIVING SOMEONE ELSE ROAD HEAD AND THEY HIT A POTHOLE. my day has been officially made.
i can't tell if you're serious or not, but 420 is gonna be pirate themed
I've grown up since last year. I don't give blow jobs as birthday presents anymore.
Just saying goodbye until I figure this whole "warrant out for my arrest" thing
If you spent as much time trying to get laid as you do masturbating you would surpass all of us.
i have 90 minutes to kick this food poisoning or josh's first experience with buttsex will be his last
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
Dude she broke four ribs, how does a 110 lb girl break four of my ribs during sex?! It hurts so bad but was so worth it
Went to 7-11 to buy condoms with the $20 I found on the ground outside Rite Aid. A good day for drug stores
I don't know how Dave is alive, I feel like he's been drinking since I met him.
Sexting and pancakes... It's going to be hard to top that
Did i fall last night when u carried me home.
idk
OHHH yea you fell down the stairs face first
THERE ARE NO EMOJIS TO SHOW MY SEXUAL FRUSTRATION
Hey do you care to explain why there are 3 empty pickle jars next to me when I woke up or do I even wanna know?
Randomize
