someone get that fucking seahorse.
I am coming home for anal
* a nap*
New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
I'm a fake celebrity on twitter. I need a life.
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
My pussy is making all kinds of justifications that my mind would have no patience for if it was still in charge
i like feelif swiord YOU ARE A GOD
The last text I sent him was about nachos. Frankly, if he can't respond positively to that he can fuck off...
I take it that, because we are not guzzling a box of franzia, everything went alright?
He's def the type to chop us into bits whilst screaming "NAPA BITCH". AKA my type
Just check with her if girls can get blown, that's all.
My dad is blowing up my phone with pictures from the midget wrestling match.
I woke up in your kitchen with my ID in my hand and my nails were painted electric blue. Dude.... never let me have fireball again.
He looked so uninterested when the stripper was slapping him. Now his roommates are harassing me about how crazy our sex must be.
i was watching the elves fighting on my knees while waiting for the shrooms to kick in then i realized
Randomize
