Idk if this white stuff in my shower is conditioner or... something else?
I KNOW. I'm like, ew who are these ppl. And then I remember I'm traveling to New York to accidentally hook it with two different dudes in one weekend.
There's a pair of socks on the bar. No-one's questioned this.
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
This is great- I found hangover detoxifying bath salt online. It flushes out the alcohol. We need this.
please hold off on going into labor, i might need you to take me to the free clinic
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
So apparently the only parts of last night I remember didn't actually happen.. When did vodka become a hallucinogen?
$200 on plane. $110 on train. $5 per drink on plane. $15 per case on train. Plane 1 hour flight. Train 9 hour excursion. Hmmmmm.
Oh yes there is. Now I'm the sad one. Please organize my life. And I will demoralize yours.
Why do I have this feeling like this is heading in a slightly threesome-y direction
All I know is I woke up with my apartment door wide open, naked, and I poured an entire bottle of Advil on my bed to sleep in.
i mean ive seen your left buttcheek how much more bro can this get
Okay so my roommate deals some drugs so whenever he leaves we can hook up, be ready
I didn't know I was the on call booty call damn
Woke up with a glow stick in my boobs this morning. Must've dominated Sunday.
Randomize